great power of ordinary people

I never lost hope that this great transformation would occur. Not only because of the great heros … but because of the courage of the ordinary men and women … I always knew that deep down in every human heart, there is mercy and generosity. No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite….. Men’s goodness is a flame that can be hidden but never extinguished. Nelson Mandela
This drawing is not my intention to accuse police. We are doing things like this without much thoughts or understanding of entire pictures. Not thinking enough is terrible and living without compassion is horrible…
This drawing I made is from one of photos in cape town, south africa 1985. Protesters were asking Mandela’s release and police used Sjamboks. Every great things in this world there could be a hero in front of that event but behind there are always greater power of these ordinary hidden people who endure the pains. Few days ago I watched a dancing video which was long ago before Michael Jackson made a breaking dance, so many others were already danced almost same style. I think it is always like that, hero doesn’t mean one was better than the others… It could be he or she is lucky one (of course they are special for sure) but this lucky star can’t exist without these many beautiful, courageous and kind ordinary nameless people…

ils s’aiment comme avant

Avant les menaces et les grands tourments
Ils s’aiment tout hésitants
Découvrant l’amour et découvrant le temps
Y a quelqu’un qui se moque
J’entend quelqu’un qui se moque
Se moque de moi, se moque de qui?

They love each other like before
Before threats and big torments
They love each other , totally irresolute
discovering love and discovering time
There’s someone mocking
I hear someone’s mocking
mocking at me, mocking at who ?

Ils s’aiment comme des enfants
Amour plein d’espoir impatient
Et malgré les regards
Remplis de désespoir
Malgré les statistiques
Ils s’aiment comme des enfants

They love each other like children.
love with full of restless hope
in spite of the gazes filled with despair
in spite of the statistics
they love each other like children

Enfants de la bombe
Des catastrophes
De la menace qui gronde
Enfants du cynisme
Armés jusqu’aux dents

Children of the bomb of catastrophe
from the outbursting threat
Children of cynicism fully armed

Ils s’aiment comme des enfants
Comme avant le menaces et les grands tourments
Et si tout doit sauter,
S’écrouler sous nos pieds
Laissons-les, laissons-les, laissons-les
Laissons-les s’aimer

They love each other like children.
Like before the threats and big torments
and if everything should blow up,
fall down under our feet
Let them , let them , let them
Let them love each other

hungry child sketch

Pencil drawings in a traditional way, it has been a long time I didn’t use pencil but when I want to express the emotion of face, pencil drawing is the best tool for me. Also for me, pencil drawing is very much healing because it liberates my anxiety by letting lines go ups and downs repeatedly and it demands my breathing steady to control these flying lines, total dedication. Giacometti wrote on his book that the line from one to another on our face are too far too abstract, it is almost impossible to draw them. I feel he is so right about that. It is like an earth, I see the vast landscape on our face lines… in the end I cheat otherwise I would never make one face.

For me drawing is an expression from one place to another place, transformation. It shouldn’t be the same. The object I draw comes through me therefore when it comes out of me it should be different, normal. For example an apple on the table, as artists we see that apple in our particular ways combining our feeling (that’s why we want to draw not because it is there), the apple becomes an exclusive one. So drawing apple is not the same apple on the table anymore. That is how Picasso went wild far beyond.

In my art world, I still want to keep reality forms a lot into my drawings though I am cautious that if it goes too much detail, it kills all my emotions in that, at the same time lack of detail kills sincerity. I expect my drawings to be changed in few years as they goes deeper and deeper. This is hungry boy’s face, I feel his anger towards unfair reality, his unkind family or abused friends around, his deep hidden sadness and misery… Living in the dirty place, no education and no one brings him food… I wanted my compassion to be expressed so it was less darker mood than a real one.

falling man

Tell me how you seek your man
And tell me all your secret spells
Tell me how you learn
To tell by his voice that he fell

I know a ghost will walk through the wall
Yet I am just a man still learning how to fall

Try to re-imagine me
And I’ll re-invent myself
Still I remember scenes
Of when you looked at someone else

If you start doubting me
Then I start to doubt myself
And never look through me
Cause I’ll keep close to myself

I am what I am
And what I am is who I am
I know what I know
And all I know is that I fell
If only I could walk through the wall
Then maybe I would tell you who I was
Yet I am just a man still learning how to fall

Satyagraha

Satya means truth or love.
Agraha means insistence or holding firmly to.

I have also called it love-force or soul force. In application of Satyagraha, I discovered in the earliest stages that pursuit of truth did not admit violence being inflicted on one’s opponent but that he must be weaned from error by patience and compassion.

For what appears to be truth to the one may appear to be error to the other.

And patience means self suffering. So the doctrine came to mean vindication of truth, not by infliction of suffering on the opponent, but on Oneself.

by Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi
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Rhinoceros symbolizes the vision, understanding, communication, power, endurance, conviction, support, heart, and, most important, the balance that those desiring to be leaders must integrate into their lives. The rhino is an endangered species, so is the true leader.

I just wanted to write down my occurring thoughts on this video.
Only because I was so believed in what these parents were talking here.
And someone who has same thoughts with me, I want to tell them what I’ve learned.
To give without calculating is divine and giving itself is a reward, this is so true but there is another big way of love.
To not give is also divine and this is the thing we shouldn’t measure it as an unimportance. Love comes from the heart and the fact that when we love someone, we want to give is a human nature. As parents we should think considerably what to give what to not give to your loving children. If you just give love without a control what these children will become…

Between in relationship you should give yes, but also you should receive. This is very important!
This is nothing to do with fish love in fact. One certain time with someone you know deep inside as family members or long life partners you can go on unconditional giving love to them, this is truly beautiful and divine. But sometimes we need to learn to wait and to receive. This is also for listening what your partner is thinking rather than assuming he or she loves you by words. And if someone doesn’t love you truly why would you want to go on, because you love this person? Then it is an egoist act out of big fear. To receive is a very difficult task to learn to remove your ego in another side and it could be much deeper love than just giving without thinking what truly is inside of your partner. Because we all are here to learn to love each other. Of course all actions (not giving love) have to come out of loving heart within ourselves. I love this video and their message of love but if it gives more details I could have much more appreciated. so voila my caution.

L’au revoir

à toi ou a moi…

Je suis partie courir dans l’au-delà

Et plonger mon coeur dans les nuages

Parmi tous ces gens dans le néant

J’ai causé l’orage en croisant ton visage
Je suis partie courir dans l’au-delà

J’ai peur de marcher seule de ne plus jamais te voir
J’ai peur que cette fois on se dise aurevoir
Je suis partie courir dans l’au-delà

J’avais construit l’immense échelle pour te rejoindre la dans le ciel mais de la haut l’air est si froid
J’ai pensé pouvoir m’accrocher me laisser suspendre dans le vide
penser enfin être libre

J’ai monté l’âme épuisée
Mais j’ai cessé d’escalader

Je suis partie courir dans l’au-delà

Mais moi je pense au lendemain
Ramène moi sur le droit chemin
J’ai comprit comme tu es bien dans l’au-delà

Comme tu es bien dans l’au-delà

Je redescends l’âme éprouvée
Mais je cesse de vouloir te retrouver

Je suis partir courir dans l’au-delà
Pour te dire au-revoir

This is for Mel.

I went running in the afterlife
And plunged my heart into the clouds
Among all these people in the nothingness
I caused the thunderstorm that is crossing your face
I went running in the afterlife

I’m scared to walk alone, to never see you again
I’m scared that this time we say goodbye
I went running in the afterlife

I had constructed an immense ladder to connect you to the sky, but at that altitude, the air is too cold
I thought I could hang on, be left hanging in the void
Thought I was finally free

I brought along my exhausted soul
But I had stopped climbing

I went running in the afterlife

But me, I think the day after
Bring me to the right path
I realized as you are well in the afterlife

As you are well in the afterlife

I descend bringing my exhausted soul
But I stop wanting to find you again

I went running in the afterlife
to say you good bye…

fear castle

killing whales

drawing by the photo of “hunting Narwhals” and I mixed with my drawing the spirit of whales mask.

original photo

mother

I don’t know why I need to draw this kind of sadness in life. When I read and see these kinds articles mostly the thoughts rises that I should draw them somehow. And I postpone most of time also with an intention that maybe the thoughts would go away.The pictures sit and wait on my table as if I owe something to them and when I eventually finish the drawings I feel released. While I was drawing this mother’s eyes such sadness in her eyes were too intense, I’ve been keep thinking what kind of person she was and now is… To lose own child is too painful even just only in a thought. How many changes occurred to her life since and is that possible the change can be positive in the end or not…… Can her wounds find a healing place…. It aches my heart. by the photo of missing american solider’s mother.

dead man

When I read the news of Bin Laden’s death something bothered me. If millions of Americans would be happy enough what does it matter that one foreigner doesn’t feel right about it… but when I read Michael Moor’s blog, I felt yes, this is what I mean. Killing bad guys like bad guys killed good guys. Eye to eye? By sudden attack and shooting all included his wife and an older son? Why didn’t they bring them to the trial? That brings some doubts. Is there really crucial secrets that the world should be in shock if Bin Laden say something? Or is it just blind killing by revenge? well… I would never know before something make me understand. While my common sense bewildered, I found this article. Americans are so vary in their thoughts but the most wonderful thing in America for me is the free voices and they always show to stand in true justice and humanity eventually. This is one of things I like about America.

Michael Moor’s article of bin laden’s death

keeping quiet

Now we will count to twelve and we will all keep still.
For once on the face of the earth, let’s not speak in any language;

let’s stop for one second, and not move our arms so much. It would be an exotic moment without rush, without engines;
we would all be together in a sudden strangeness.

Fisherman in the cold sea would not harm whales and the man gathering salt would look at his hurt hands. Those who prepare green wars, wars with gas, wars with fire, victories with no survivors, would put on clean clothes and walk about with their brothers in the shade, doing nothing. What I want should not be confused with total inactivity.

Life is what it is about; (….) If we were not so single-minded about keeping our lives moving, and for once could do nothing, perhaps a huge silence might interrupt this sadness of never understanding ourselves and of threatening ourselves with death. Perhaps the earth can teach us as when everything seems dead and later proves to be alive. Now I’ll count up to twelve and you keep quiet and I will go. —from Extravagaria (translated by Alastair Reid, pp. 27-29, 1974) “Keeping Quiet” by Pablo Neruda

beautiful image

So many children died and hurt by their own country army… Such a tragic. It is hard to watch their situation. It is obviously very wrong with their president who showed his calmness in quiet and intelligent attitude in his interview. Hello, it is your country people, so many are dying and you just deny the fact with smile in your neat suit… this is wrong. You can’t be quiet if someone accuse you as a murderer of your own people.

This is from England Journal. Such a beautiful charming lady but will she have a courage?

help him… crying man

My friends don’t like at all when I paint miseries. I know it has been few years I changed my paintings to be not miseries in the world but beautiful decoration for selling. But I just have a freaking nature inspired so much from suffering moments. I cry when I paint or draw them. I just have to draw and … voila. This is story of a man crying out asking help his brother in Syria. The article said Syria is no longer sliding into war or staring at the abyss of war. Syria is at War. Why this kind of war never ends? Whom to blame? The sky? we have to care more, know more and love more….

Two days ago I saw for the first time Kony 2012 video, I was of course crying and made a little donation right away and then I found out Jason was arrested in Sandiego. I was thinking what is the big deal and what kind of bad people make issues around this? He has already done lots of good work, maybe he got too much pressure… He needs to be embraced not criticized then….. his behavior made me study a bit. Simply yes, I studied. I was pretty upset when I figured out all the different facts specially from ugandan civilians. I searched all people’s blogs and watched more than 15 of videos. Another few hours I spent time to think then I made my conclusion with this blog from here
http://justiceinconflict.org/2012/03/17/kony-2012-how-100-million-clicks-went-to-waste/
I decided it’s fair to think that way. The truth is so difficult to know but I also thought I would never make any donation without committing myself in real situation which means if I want to help someone I will help someone that I can see and feel. If I want to help african children I will go someday there and help them with heart. Not blindly like this. I am learning my lessons through all. However I have to say WoW…. everything was… just wow.

hunger and dignity

Hunger puts lives of millions at risk.  I drew this from one of great photos of Uncertain grace (by Sebastinaos Salgado). These kinds of photos inspire me so much. We should keep remember them. There is one story told in that album; a poor fisherman who refused to sell to one young rich gentleman who wanted to buy all his shellfish. Fisherman said  ” I am the master in my hunger.” I respect people’s dignity which can’t be negotiable even in the most crawl reality. bravo.